Five Months

Little girl, you're not so little anymore. You are positively heavy when I'm trying to lift you and your monster car seat. Of course I had to have the bigger seat because it was so darn cute, I didn't know it was also impractical. Your personality is also getting bigger. The screaming is wearing thin, but now the giggles are commonplace and you love attention (just like your mommy!) You're starting to be okay playing by yourself in the mornings. I'll walk past your room and see that you're completely awake and just looking quietly at your hands or watching the world or me.
Being back at work I feel like I miss so much, I miss you during the day while I'm gone and when I get home in the evening you need constant attention or you get pretty cranky, not like the mornings when you're mostly an angel (I don't know what dad is talking about when he tells me you won't let him put you down and he can't get anything done.)
You're still anti-tummy time but I refuse to let your hollering dissuade me from letting you build muscles in your back. I think your lack of lots of tummy time is one reason why you don't roll over yet. Have I mentioned that I worry about that everyday? I do. I know that every child develops at different rates, but I'm sure that you are absolutely refusing to become mobile in any way shape or form because you want us at your beck and call to move you, or reposition you or take you to new places. If you're still not moving at 9 months, you're on your own kid, no way I'm carting you around forever.
You are starting to outgrow some of your 6 month clothes and I'm so sad. You had so many cute outfits, once your into your 9 month outfit, half your closet will be boxed up and then I may have to start buying you new outfits rather than relying on the shower gifts! I'm trying to talk daddy into actually putting you into an outfit each day or changing you from yesterdays outfit, but he baulks at that since most of the time he refuses to put your pants back on after a diaper change as you're just going to get wet again, why bother? Boys. You'll learn that they are very lazy.
You started solid foods! Sort of. About 2 weeks ago I gave you the tiniest bit of rice cereal mixed with so much formula that it was probably more like soup than solids, but you're just learning, I figure it's all solid for you. The first few time I don't think you swallowed very much, but now you've decided that you want to gnaw on the spoon when I stick it in your mouth, so I think more of the cereal is making it to the back of your throat. Someone suggested that I get one of those bottle-things that you can use for solid mushy foods, but really, if you're suppose to be learning what to do with the solid foods, doesn't that defeat the purpose? Your not underweight, you eat fine, so I'm not going to force feed you. You can thank me later.
We're looking into daycare. We haven't approached Abuela Virginia yet but chances are we are going to have to leave you in the care of strangers at least a few days a week once daddy finds employment. And unfortunately it could be a long term decision, or around a year anyway. I know that lots of moms have to work outside the home to help support the family, but I don't want to have to one of them, I'm just praying that dad finds something that can support all of us, and soon.
It's been a great 5 months, you're growing healthy and strong, and you're a delightful little snot who makes me laugh everyday. Although I already miss snuggly little newborn Hayley, I'm excited to hang out with the new little person that you're becoming.
Love,
Mama